I'm gonna give all my secrets away...

Okay, well they aren't really secrets at all, but here are few randoms comments. (I love the song playing, it's "Secrets" by OneRepublic)

-My favorite tv shows these days: Southland and Blue Bloods. So strange that they are both cop shows, and I've never been a big fan of these types of shows (I hate Law&Order the most!). But Southland and Blue Bloods are both more about the characters than the "cases." If you've never seen either one, it's def worth a watch. But if I could only recommend one of them, it would hands down be Southland.
-Other shows I watch (that I'm not necessarily proud of): Teen Mom 2, Jersey Shore, Tosh.0, Holly's World, Kardashians, (basically the MTV and E! trash shows)
-Went with Stacy to look at new apartments in downtown Dallas. So exciting! They are soo beautiful, and make my little New York loving friend feel like she has the best of both worlds. I can't wait to help her move in. :)
-Zac and I saw Black Swan. Wow...so dark and extremely difficult to watch, but beautiful and complex at the same time. Natalie Portman was amazing. Zac and I are so weird about movies like this though. It's like we are in shock or something. We laughed the WHOLE way home, quoting the movie and talking about different parts. My poor sister thought Monster was going to be a comedy, the way Zac and I joked about it and quoted it (back in 2004), so boy was she in for a surprise when she finally saw it! LOL!
-Girl Talk!!! The show was awesome! We were in the balcony, so we felt a little removed from the big group, but it was still amazing! A big dance party! It's pretty much just the guy on his laptop, but there is still so much to look at, because there was a huge screen that had tight visuals, and then they were constantly dropping balloons or confetti, or beach balls. They also had this toilet paper gun that would just blast toilet paper into the air...sounds weird but it looked awesome! Here are a few pics from the GREAT night! Thanks Eli and Ryan! (and thank you Stacy for my cool "Str8 Against H8!" shirt!)

We are going to see Robyn on February 17th...I can't wait! I have loved her forever! Alot of people know the name, but can't place the songs. She is pretty big in America, but she is HUGE in Europe. (She's Swedish.) Perhaps some of these titles/videos will ring a bell? Show Me Love...my current favorite Handle Me...and my childhood favorite Do You Know What It Takes. Another one I always jam to, and her most popular (reached #1) is With Every Heartbeat. Enjoy her live performance below...

Oh, I love Francesca's

Dear friends,
I would like to own every outfit (from head to toe, accessories included) on THIS page.
Thanks for your time,
Julia

Room to spare...

Just when you think your heart has reached it's capacity, and that every cell in your heart is promised to someone impaticular, and you love that person not just a little but a whole lot, and surely you can't love someone new the way you already love so many people in your life...you meet that new person, who crawls inside your heart, nestles into a cozy little spot, and then you know they will be there forever! That, my friends, is how I felt today! I cherish so many relationships in my life, and love dearly my family, my friends, my students, my co-workers, my nieces and nephews, sometimes it feels like I couldn't possibly have more heart to spare. But today I met Ada, and realized I have a whole BIG chunk of my heart for her to own, and really she already does! I imagine it will be this way when I meet future nieces and nephews, and I know it will definitely be this way when we have our own children. So I have two philosophies...either each person doesn't have their "own space," but instead they all overlap and make-up one big complicated-but-beautiful heart of mine, OR my heart just keeps growing and growing and making room for all the AMAZING people in my life. Either way, I don't care, it doesn't matter to me how it works. I'm just so happy that I'm lucky enough to have my heart BURSTING AT THE SEAMS because I have so many relationships (little ones, and adults!) that I treasure and love. Wow...I'm on a little bit of a high right now. I think life is as sweet sometimes as the snow ice cream I shared with Ada and Claire and Nati today!

She is not only stunningly beautiful, but she is so sweet and loving, as well as SMART! I wouldn't call her shy, because she likes interacting with people, she is quite social, but she is a little reserved. It took her a little time to warm up, and she didn't talk a whole lot, but she had 100% of our attention whenever she was around! She is precious! Thank you Ellen and Braegan for bringing yet another amazing child into our lives! Between Madeline, Eliza, Owen, Nati, Claire, Sam and Ada, I feel very very blessed and RICH in the Aunt category!!! :)
PS-You know I love music, and love finding music that matches my mood...how PERFECT is this song? (Colbie Caillet-You Got Me) "You got me. The way you take my hand is just so sweet. And that crooked smile of yours, knocks me off my feet. Oh, I just can't get enough. How much do I need to fill me up? It feels so good, it must be love. It's everything that I've been dreaming of. I give up, I give in, I let go, let's begin, 'cause no matter what I do, oh, MY HEART IS FILLED WITH YOU!"

Picture, picture, on the wall...

My friend Erin (unknowingly) inspired me to create this post, as she is always posting her inspiration and house projects. Ready?...O-Kay! (cheerleader style)
I love photos, and love picture frames too. I have always liked the look of multiple frames on one wall, and like it even more when the frames don't match. Here are a few looks I like a lot.

Anyways, I have a wall in my living room that I have thought was a bit bare for awhile now. Thanks to Aaron Brothers "One Cent Sale" (where you buy a frame and get the next for a penny!), I just bought a bunch of new frames. I knew I didn't want them to match, but I did want them to coordinate or at least compliment each other. I decided to go with brown and cream, with hints of gold. Picking the frames was a project in itself, but was lots of fun and actually didn't take too too long. Ya know what DID take a Loooong time? Laying out the frames and figuring out how to hang them on the wall. I had never realized how difficult this step was! All the frames are different sizes, which makes it a challenge to put them altogether and still make it visually pleasing without being too symmetrical or too spread apart. Anyways, here is what I decided on, after playing with them on the floor for an hour... (pic taken standing on the couch, with my phone, so excuse the poor quality)

So now that the "hard part" was behind me, all I had to do was hang them! Ha! Ha ha ha! The hard part was JUST beginning. Maybe I'm being dramatic, or maybe I'm not very smart, but the math involved made my head hurt! It was like solving a puzzle trying to figure out the measurements and get these puppies hung. At one point I even thought "maybe I'll just put it back how I had it and give the frames as gifts...this is too much work!" but I pressed on, and when it was finished I stood back and had the biggest smile on my face. I love it. As I type this, sitting on the couch, I keep looking up, and thinking how PLEASED I am with my work. :)
Here is the final product...

Pretty huh? Now...to decide which cherished pics get to go inside these lovely frames! :)

It's not that I'm needy, just need you to see me

There are a few times a year that make me dig deep. Around my birthday and new years eve, I always seem to reflect on the past months and year, and look to the future, setting goals and plans, and asking questions. Not intentionally, like "okay, it's been 6 months, time to sit down and evaluate my life." It just happens. I just find myself doing it. And it's always a quiet and contemplative process. Not something I can talk through. Because as much as I love to talk about everything to anyone who will listen, this is such a PERSONAL thing. Just me, myself, and I, to hash through these thoughts and emotions. Because no one (including myself a lot of times) can understand what I think and why, or how I feel and where it's coming from. It's a deep complicated thing, and as confusing and complex as it may be, I kind of like that I do it. And as I get older, I see a change in my thoughts, in my plans, and how I look at the past. 2010 has definitely been a year of growth for me. My first "real" job has demanded more of me than I ever thought I would be asked, and I have to say, I think I've delivered. I never thought I would be the type to think about work 24/7, or work an 80 hour work week, but I became that person this fall. Not that I wanted to necessarily, or that I enjoyed it, but the fact is, I did it. I needed to, in order to make my classroom work, and I did it. I rose to the challenge. I have dealt with an overwhelming stress that I've never faced before. I have cried in the bathroom on my lunch break, and I have felt as if I will never be good enough for this job and these kids. But that's because I love them, and I care, and they deserve the best, and HOW IN THE WORLD DO YOU DELIVER THE BEST? Is that what being a mom feels like? My gosh, what a heavy and daunting feeling. Anyways, this year, and mostly this new job, have made me rise to a new level. Professionally. Personally. Emotionally. Mentally. This has been a year of 'building character,' and as HARD as it's been, I appreciate looking back and being able to say I worked my butt off. Long story short: I'm tougher than I thought I was.

I LOVE the song I have playing (if your sound is off, turn it on and refresh the page so you can hear the beautiful song). I intentionally put this song at the top of my playlist for this post, and I've pasted the lyrics below. It's deep, and although it's someone elses words, it describes how I feel right now...

I am timid
And I am oversensitive
I am a lioness
I am tired and defensive
You take me in your arms
And I fold into you
I have insecurities
You show me I am beautiful

Love me or leave me just take it or leave it
It's not that I'm needy just need you to see me
Take me, free me, see through to the core of me
Take me, free me, there will be no more pretending

I am temperamental
And I have imperfections
And I am emotional
I am unpredictable
I am naked
I am vulnerable
I am a woman
I am opening up to you

Love me or leave me, just take it or leave it
It's not that I'm needy, just need you to see me
Take me, free me, see through to the core of me
Take me, free me, there will be no more pretending

Now I stand before you with my heart in my hands
I'm asking you to take me just the way that I am

Please lay down your arms
Do you know me?
Make me feel safe from harm

Oh just take me, free me, see through to the core of me
Take me, free me, there will be no more pretending

I am temperamental
And I have imperfections
And I am emotional
There'll be no more pretending